Firstly, a thank you to the 15 people who opened up to me this holiday season about how the holidays are depressing them and other social anxiety issues, many people feel social tension or loneliness throughout the year and it can deepen around the holidays and the new year. You’re not alone.
Thanks for really believing that social skills are learnable. This Jaunty journey is teaching me that no matter what personality type someone may have, our communication skills can always be enhanced and worked on.I know it’s hard to go against the voices that say, “That’s just how you are and there’s nothing you can do about it.” But it’s possible to live the social life you want. I promise. I get messages all the time from our students who have turned their lifestyle goals into a reality.
Also, our January course is beyond filled! I think I’m going to have to find a bigger space for our courses, I can’t wait for this next one, so thank you.
Finally– It’s the start of a new year! So I’ve got a two day challenge for you.
Now, this is a social challenge for you.
In the next 48 hours (from the second you read this) I’d like you to give someone a playful situational task. Extra points if it’s a stranger. This embeds playfulness in your conversation.
Here’s an example: I was recently on a plane traveling solo and as everyone was getting settled in our seat row I was preparing my music. I said to the women beside me, “This is the first time I’m using noise cancelling headphones, so you’re in charge of making sure I don’t miss any important announcements OK?” She laughed and said she’ll probably be sleeping through all announcements since she just drank a martini.
This task will sure you are more aware of your environment, and may get you used to creating things to say that’s relevant to the moment.
Other ideas:“Make sure Katy doesn’t eat all the free mints, she likes them more than I do!” (to your front desk associates)
“Keep your eye on me and don’t let me get two desserts, k?” (At the company party)
“I might need some help deciding what looks good, you up for the challenge?” (While waiting at the Nordstrom changing rooms)
You get the idea…can you do it? Try to throw these playful quips in somewhere. They are great ways to start a conversation too. You can also turn these into playful questions (this falls under using accusations for humor):
“So you’re the one in charge of making sure no one eats ALL the free mints huh?”
If you think you can do it, you’ve got 48 hours.